Someone asked this less than a month ago and there was a debate about "doing it for the team" -- pretending to be more sexual as a favor to your partner. Are you getting any non-baby time, aside from working outside the home if you do? Maybe it would help to truly accept that your libido isn't what it was, for now; it just isn't, no matter the reason, and that's the new normal and that's okay - work with that. Unfortunately, for me, a nooner sometimes sounded somewhat interesting, but Mr. Having an open dialogue can prevent further relationship issues. Then you're not going to feel mentally into it, you've built up an adverse reaction right there. But also a few changes have happened:
If you have space in your relationship to let things be what they are, and kisses be simply kisses with no added meaning, and sex only happen when you think you feel a bit of spark - then you can live in the new norm pretty securely. Don't worry, this is normal and will go away as the baby becomes more independent and nurses less. Unfortunately, for me, a nooner sometimes sounded somewhat interesting, but Mr. Is there anything I can do to support a healthier sex drive in the meantime? If I kept track of that, and made a bit of effort that time of month, it was easier to get in the mood, and for my husband to "get lucky". So perhaps you should listen to your body for a bit and consider a different time of day. My spouse is a wonderful person who I love deeply. If your cycle is still MIA, I'd say it's highly likely hormones are affecting your sex drive. Will my libido return when I stop breastfeeding? July 22, 7: If you dread kissing, are you dreading it because you feel like "oh here we go, this is going to lead to sex probably" or lead to you feeling like you should go ahead and have sex even if you don't want to? Will my libido come back after my baby weans? Life is just not going to be the same as it was before having kids, so judging ourselves by what we used to be isn't helpful. Things got a little better when I stopped breastfeeding. You might feel like you want to slap the next person who puts their hands on you. You're essentially out of practice if you haven't felt those feelings in a long time. I have almost no desire for my spouse. Post-baby, I have essentially no sex drive. Being out of practice will make you feel uncomfortable and self-conscious, and make it worse. My drive is greatly increased when I'm ovulating. It's possible there's something else going on, but if it is just breastfeeding, then yes, you'll probably get your libido back when you wean. After some touching, caressing or kissing, we may feel like more after all. Each time you nurse, your prolactin levels jump to 10X normal concentrations, and they take hours to go back down. I'm not really on the side of "fake it 'til you make it"; maybe it would work better for you to take the pressure off somehow, to allow yourself the space to have a low libido and have that be okay - to have kissing not be loaded with all this extra meaning, if it is? Are you getting any non-baby time, aside from working outside the home if you do?
Video about low sex drive in nursing mothers:
Breastfeeding Reduced Libido
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