I'd never taken it for granted that I'd be able to have children and not one day has passed since we found out I was expecting that I haven't felt lucky. And I feel that expectant people fall into two tribes. As the days passed, I too began to feel I'd been a brat. It Pisses People Off I've written about this before but it bears repeating. I realise that, if we're lucky and everything works out OK, it's only about three months before we get to experience that new life every day. But for me, there has never been a happier, more exciting, cooler surprise than jockeying for position in the delivery room to see whether I had a son or a daughter. This excitement is perhaps epitomised in the trend for "gender reveal" parties in the States, where the results of the scan are baked into a cake to be shared with family and friends at a special gathering pink icing for a girl, blue for a boy.
If people knew we were having another boy it'd be "Oh man, MJ is gonna be so outnumbered" and "Oh I can't say for certain what made us secretly go for a private scan five weeks after that inconclusive result. I've talked to people who literally get hives when we tell them we're waiting, because the mere thought of not knowing drives them into a panic. We knew we'd be delighted whatever the sex. The messageboards of Mumsnet and other parenting websites bear witness to just how much some people invest in dreams of a boy or girl. We just wanted to be able to imagine our little family in one, five, 10 years' time and instinctively felt that would be easier knowing the baby's sex. Finding out right then and there in the moment was absolutely fantastic. In a few short weeks, the wait will be over and, all being well, the tide of pink or blue teddies, balloons and cards from friends and relatives will slowly take over my flat. Surely, when handed their screaming bundle of joy, no one ever yelled at the midwife, "But this isn't what I wanted"? But the whole experience of pregnancy and childbirth has become so medicalised and closely monitored that I find myself clinging gratefully to this last little pocket of mystery. You need to hold it over your bump on a thread, and if you are expecting a boy it will move back and forth, if it's a girl it will move in circles. Advertisement Via your wedding ring Yep, really. By not finding out the sex, you effectively force people to think at least a little bit outside the box and consider things that are gender neutral. Some people -- especially the control freaks, Type As, and rabid planners out there -- need as much information as possible at all times. Same goes for relatives. Suki Dhanda for the Observer NO Memories of my first labour — a hour marathon of pain, fear and Entonox-induced delirium — are somewhat hazy, but there is one moment that stands out with complete clarity: And I feel that expectant people fall into two tribes. Not finding out the sex cuts off this avenue of discussion completely. For me, the decision was never just about saving up the surprise for the big day. It's a lot more difficult for your mother-in-law to express her disappointment when you hand her her brand new grandchild. But, if she doesn't listen later in your pregnancy, you can always ask. Especially when my wife was pregnant with our second. Your best friend swears your bump is so pointy you are obviously having a girl, while your mum keeps telling you that you are 'carrying low' whatever that means and are sure to be expecting a boy — but is there really any way of knowing? It's really quite interesting to hear the theories bandied about by these baby soothsayers, which all seem to have been handed down by grandparents and great-grandparents and are NEVER wrong. They ask MJ what foods she's been craving and if she mentions something sweet, they automatically say girl while sour equals boy.
Video about find sex of baby before birth:
How to Know the Gender of Your Baby Naturally in Pregnancy
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